I've been going back to the significant life events of the past couple of years, especially after reading Digital Minimalism by Cal Newport, and managed to discover something really important about myself: I've been growing in a stressful and hurtful environment since about 2016.
The situation is a mix of multiple things:
I noticed that I've been fueled by hatred and ignorance because of the incredibly noisy world we live in. We're inundated with alarming and stressful news every day from multiple sources, all of our social networks and the people we follow, all of our friends and relatives throwing gasoline on the fires, and me overthinking everything that happens.
It is enough.
One of the many steps I've decided to make myself the person I want to be is to stop engaging with most news, especially around politics, economics, and worldwide events that I don't have any control over. Thankfully, I've managed to create a platform for myself that allows me to have a small but important sense of safety that I've lacked for almost my entire life.
My social networks became a source of hate, ignorance, of everyone complaining about things they could easily change in their lives if they wanted to, or fix their problems but don't want to do any work or put any effort into doing so.
I'm cleaning my mind from these things because I know whatever their outcome is, it won't have a significant impact on my current way of living, my working conditions, or my life. It's just noise.
On top of deciding to stop worrying about these external situations, I'm also cleaning up my social networks.
About 5 years ago I started practicing intentional relationships, surrounding myself with smart, good, empathic people. At some point during the past 3 years, I stopped being intentional about it and instead decided to say yes to pretty much anything, I tried to please everyone and I put more attention on the outer world instead of my inner one.
I started to be flexible on the type of people I hang out with, often finding myself in places I didn't want to go to, talking to people who didn't share my values and compromised mine instead.
My Instagram and Twitter were full of people I wasn't interested in or in their inner person, I was just following the crowd, famous or recognized people I didn't honestly care about. I'm cleaning my sources so I can surround myself with people I want to be like, who share great values, ideas and live lives to the standards I want to live mine.
I've been going through a month of cleaning my mind, of purifying my sources, of trying to surround myself with people I want to be like, not with people I'd be ashamed to be caught with on a Saturday night.
The pandemic only made this worse, I wasn't thinking clearly, I wasn't behaving myself to my proper standards and aligned with my moral compass. I've made multiple mistakes because of this, I don't plan to let myself get to the point where I'll make the same mistakes again. I lost my north but I'm slowly and steadily finding it back.
I'm prioritizing my friends, my family, my closest coworkers, the people I want to hang out with, the people I really care about. I'm giving them my best.
I invite you to do the same.
Published by Julio Montaño on Feb 24, 2021